Drumming on the Hills

The past few weeks of beautiful warm summer sunshine has enticed me out to various locations with my drum. In early June I travelled up to Croft Ambrey (in Herefordshire) after work in the hope of watching the sunset over the Welsh hills. I didn't quite manage to get there on time, but I was rewarded with a wonderfully warm and quiet period of space up on the hill top. The May blossom on the various hawthorns on the hillside was superb and as the evening light faded I had a very peaceful, yet expressive time in the landscape I love so much.


Last weekend I happened to be awake at about 3.15am on a restless night and decided that this would be a good opportunity to go and watch the sunrise on the Pegsdon Hills near Hitchin. Not being sure at what time sunrise was, I wasn't too sure I would get there on time as it was already getting light. I strapped my drum to the back of my bike and cycled off through the country lanes, with the moon watching me, and up the hill above Pegsdon. It was a tiny bit chilly, the sky was clear of coud and the views were superb. I found a space to sit just sheltered from the cool breeze and at that moment the bright orange sun just began to emerge from the haze on the distant horizon. I think it was about 4.55am. My drum wasn't really in the mood for playing - being a bit flat in the cold and dampness of the early dawn.

Where have I been?

Here I am in the middle of June and this blog seems so distant to me. I have written so little this year because my energy seems to need to be directed elsewhere.

Work is thoroughly rewarding and challenging and I do enjoy it but it has been demanding and it has taken me a while to settle into the new working environment from a psychological point of view. It has been mentally tiring at times and settling into a balance is taking time. My hands have been troubled with RSI and I am having to work hard with self-physiotherapy to calm things down. This has meant that I have been unwilling to use my hands for typing at home. Thankfully, I am now much better and none of my work has been affected.

Much to my annoyance, I also seem to have been afflicted with periods of deep anxiety and I am hopefully overcoming this with exercise, meditation and self-awareness exercises. It all seems pathetic really as all I am doing is well within my ability but, again, I feel as though I am trying to find a balance.

My back went on me a few weeks ago and so I am trying to get that back in order too.

This seems to have been a Spring of readjustment and mental struggle to the new situation in which I find myself.

My Permaculture Course is superb and I now have only one more weekend in July to complete.

The vegetables in the garden are doing well but I am not sure if I will continue with the allotment as I can't put much effort into it. The garden is easy to micro-manage whereas the allotment is a small drive away and not quite so easy to visit. I will re-evaluate it at the end of the year.

I've been out with my drum to various locations: a drumming group, the hills of Herefordshire, my permaculture course and the garden summerhouse.

Blessings.

Reflection on creative thought

At last the evenings have been getting warmer and, although still a little on the chilly side, I have managed to spend an hour in the summerhouse tonight without shivvering. With a candle, drum and some newly acquired 'Ceridwen'incense I felt able to relax and draw upon some deeply needed inspiration.

I've written a few things in my sketchpad over the past few weeks that somehow haven't made it to this blog. I don't think I have been deeply inspired which feels a little strange perhaps as Spring is beginning to arise all around me. The winter has been long and cold but now the maiden of spring is dancing over the landscape and things are bursting forth - or something like that! It may be because I have started a new job and all the energy and focus that I had to plough into my previous 'existence' is now having a rest and my soul work is taking a back seat whilst I just get on with walking my new path. I'm able to relax a little now in that sense and yet would very much like to redirect my spirtual nature into its new framework and look for a new direction.

I pray for clarity of thought and the ability to just get my brain thinking about things and being more creative. Often it just seems to clog up and stall and can't grasp even simple things or think clearly. Perhaps I am just getting older and need to develop exercises to just unlock more exploratory and creative thinking. Perhaps I need to dig out "The Artists Way" again and do some more daily journalling. It is just discipline though snd creating space in the day to do it. Or perhaps I should develop somthing else; or do more exercise, drink less coffee....

Principles of Permaculture

I have begun my Permaculture Design course which will last for six weekends from now until July.

In the first introductory weekend I learnt about 12 principles of Permaculture which can be applied to any system - ecological, horticultural or social:

• Integrate rather than segregate


• Observe and Interact


• Use small and slow solutions


• Design from patterns to details


• Apply self-regulation and accept feedback


• Use and value renewable resourcesd and services


• Use edges and value the marginal


• Obtain a yield


• Use and value diversity


• Produce no waste


• Creatively use and respond to change

New Job

I am now almost two weeks into my new job and have so far not regretted moving one bit. Leaving my old work place was very hard because, I think, it was like leaving a small and dark cardboard box in which I had been encased for too long. I had become very emotionally attached to the the people there which was probably some sort of survival mechanism. I know that I had been in that place for a reason: either to learn something new, to be a stepping stone to further my career or perhaps something more subtle - to influence or change something or someone in some way (or to be changed or influenced). I believe there was spiritual reason for me to be in that place but now I almost feel as though I have been released from the rather strange energy that held me there until a few weeks ago.

My new workplace is full of a new and vibrant energy and I am still rather amazed at why I have found myself in such a creative, friendly and welcoming environment. Things may change: there will be challenging work situations and the pressure to be creative and meet deadlines will be tough at times but I feel confident I can grow and be part of the team there. I am surrounded by many very talented designers and illustrators and, as I am always a bit modest about my talents, I can find that a bit overwhelming. I am a bit of a Jack of All Trades when it comes to design and never quite know where I fit.

One of the hardest things to get used to is that I have more free time in the day. I can leave home half an hour later in morning and I get half an hour more at lunchtime. What is also rather pleasant is that there are some footpaths around where I work so I can get out into some fields or parkland and get more exercise and fresh air during the day.

Hopton Titterhill and Black Hill: Part 4

Saturday 6 March 2010
I walk into the valley. I climb down the very steep hillside through the discarded wood and tree stumps of the felled trees to the tiny stream that I can hear way below me. Its source can't be far away, the hilltop rises above me up a narrow and steep-sided valley. A gentle trickle of water, bubbling and gurgling over the shale. I put a hand into the water. it is cold. I cup my hand and lift some water to taste it. It feels soft and smooth with a string earthy taste. I don't swallow it.

It is sheltered down here aware from the cool breeze of the hilltop. The stream is a source of life and energy in the valley. Flowing, following its course, a habitat for the stream-side saxifrages and the damp loving loving mosses that encase the overhanging trees.

What is the central stream that flows through me and my life? What nourishes and sustains me? In this valley is a persistent yet delicate stream- so easily changed by the weather and other environmental or human factors. Yet its function is to carry water through the valley safely. I must take care of the stream in my life. And the sound is continuous, no ebb and flow like the wind. The stream is. It does what is has to do. It is strong and unstoppable. It has to be or else land would flood. It has a continuous physical dynamic to outwork: to flow downhill.

I now have to leave this place and do other things. This has been a a day for writing, for looking at the landscape around me and for framing the big changes that are occurring in my life.

Thank you for this day.

Hopton Titterhill and Black Hill: Part 3

Saturday 6 March 2010
Landscape. How I love that word. It is a word I use a lot in the context of my journeying and the environment that is laid out for me in my daily walk through life. I'm up on Black Hill now, just a couple of miles from Hopton Titterhill, and looking westwards. Before me is the wonderful hilly landscape of the Welsh borderland between Knighton and Clun. The sun has penetrated the hazy clouds in a few places, otherwise the light is subdued and shadowless. Today I am just going where I feel lead, no distinct plan of action as such. Now I am sitting by the roadside overlooking a revealed valley. Only since a year or so ago has this view been seen once again after many years of being obscured by a tall conifer plantation. The conifers have been felled and now the view has returned again and I could sit here for hours.

What does this view have to tell me about my journey? Revealing, or revelation. Something that was hidden for a long time but which can now be seen. It used to be there in one form or another - before the conifers were planted. Perhaps the view that I see of my life was also, too visible, once a time ago. A momentary glint in the eye of the Divine that set my life alive in the knowledge that it would, one day, be revealed. Now this phase in my life is opening up and I admire the view.

The sound of the wingbeat of a crow brushes across the hillside. A buzzard calls, far below me. I am on the edge of a view - at a vantage point. I am not in the view itself, that will come later.

The earth is still quite dormant and there are still tiny patches of snow in sheltered hedgerow edges. The valley has yet to wake up to the full energy of spring. Perhaps the biggest challenge I will face in my new job is that of dealing with different and more varied people once again. What can my view tell me about how I should relate to the new people I am about to meet?

Peace: hold your peace and know your own confidence and belonging.
Difference: everyone is different. Nature is diverse. It can be good, it can be cruel. Co-existance is a key to survival.
Sounds: just listen, and don't interfere with the balance of what is before you. Think before you upset the balance.
Creativity: is part of the natural energy of nature.
Light: and therefore energy, will come and go. Some days may be pale and shadowless, others will be bright and full of contrast.