Provision

Reflection on the sermon at Stopsley Baptist Church (2 Aug 2015) and the YouTube video by Matthew Fox: 'Recovering the sacredness of the earth'.

"If God gives me all that I need, what am I striving for?"

Having pondered this question for the past day or so, two words keeps popping into my mind: understanding and survival. I think it is a slight misjudgement for me to feel that if I am loved by God and he/she gives me all I need then I need not strive for anything. What is important is the intention behind the actions that govern what I say or do. I could just sit back and dwell in the 'love of God' and not really utilise the fact that I am a unique person with gifts and abilities and the conscious ability to change my interaction with the environment around me. I have a responsibility to be the human being that I am and I think that to be aware of who, what and where I am is key to my spiritual life. I need to be thankful for what I have and it is all to easy to let the days go by without really appreciating all that I have around me: family, food, house, work, garden, fresh air, some degree of freedom to be who I want to be etc. But life is about getting out and about and doing something. I am not one for petitioning God for everything either, I believe I am expected to try and sort out lots of things myself and not to try and hide behind a glib "God will sort it all out" that invalidates any reason for my existence.

My attempt to be a spiritual person means that I am striving for understanding, not to do so would be an insult to God, and my understanding is often based on the awe I have for Nature.

"Radical amazement is the beginning of authentic religious feeling."

"The world in all its grandeur is full of spiritual radiance."

"Awareness of the Divine begins with Awe."

"Many people think of God as they would a cow: what can they get out of it?"

I happily admit that I strive for things and that is because I have to in order to stay alive and have some sort of pleasant existence on this earth. I am not going to go into details about this here as this is just a general comment. Intention is important though and I will happily admit that perhaps I push too hard for somethings and should let more things just "be". Deciding on where to strike the right balance is a key issue. There are many positive times in life when you have to find the energy and motivation to succeed. I recently had to take on a bigger piece of responsibility at work which I thoroughly enjoyed. Then there are times when all the hard work I put into growing vegetables in the garden seems in vain until the summer rains come and then everything suddenly flourishes. I would love to have the luxury of a more relaxed lifestyle. Yes, perhaps God would provide, but I am not at the moment willing to put that to the test I am not always sure it is a matter of faith making decisions like that.

To summarise, I do believe that I have all the resources around me that I need for being who I am and perhaps I need need to be more aware of how to utilise what motivates and inspires me.

Conversation

"Hello, I thought you were just about to go." 

"I was, but I was enjoying sketching here and wanted to stay for a few moments longer." 

"I haven't seen you for a long time. When were you last up here?" 

"I can't remember, it must have been back in the spring when I walked up here with my family." 

"What has kept you away?" 

"Oh, you know, the busyness of life. Lots of things to do and I know that isn't really a very good excuse. Also, to be honest, I have been struggling to be inspired by things. It is hard when you feel you are a lonely walker and it isn't easy to find others who can share similar interests. I was out walking the other day with some friends and the most memorable thing I experienced was walking past a isolated tree and just stopping for a moment to listen to the sound of the wind in its branches. It was awesome, and yet in that moment of deep awe I was quite alone." 

"Do you feel alone now?" 

"I never feel alone outside in places like this. How can you feel alone when surrounded by trees, all the plants on the woodland floor, a wren, a chiffchaff, and so many other  natural things around me. Yes, I am alone in a human sense and no-one has walked past me on this path for the past hour or so. I am a brief visitor to this place today." 

"Why did you stop here?" 

"It is just an interesting group of trees up on the hilltop here. It is a long time since I have been to this wood when the trees are in leaf and I had forgotten how enclosed it feels when compared to being here in the winter. It is very windy today and here there is shelter for me because I wanted to do some drawing and I am not keen on sitting in the wind.  When I got here the sunshine was pouring down through the leaves and, due to the wind, the sunlight was dancing about all over the place. It looked wonderful." 

"What are you thinking of?" 

"Stillness, even in the wind. Here I can sit and just enjoy this place. The sun keeps going behind the clouds but when it is out the place is transformed into a place of light, shadow, colour, movement and wonder. Nature does many things so well. What often intrigues me is that I hardly ever meet anyone on my walks or when I am sitting drawing who I instantly feel has a deep interest in their surroundings like I do. I very rarely meet anyone who is an artist, a creative or anyone who looks vaguely like I could have an interesting conversation with them." 

"I know what you are feeling. I think it is a gift, and a path that is hard to walk. Perhaps it is a yoke you are carrying. Keep walking. These trees have stood for many years. They take time to grow, adapt and evolve in their landscape. I know you stuggle, but just look at the beauty you find all around you. This is the wonder of creativity. Take hold of your creative spirit again. Do not be afraid. Dance like the sunlight dances in this wood today." 

"Thank you. I think I needed some encouragement." 

"That's fine. It has been good to see you again. Come and talk anytime, anywhere." 

"Can I share this?" 

"Yes do." 

"Thank you for this place. I think I will go now and continue on my bike ride." 

"My pleasure. Bye bye."

Abundance

Reflections on Jesus feeding the 4000 (Mark 8: 1-10)

The performing of a miracle in this passage is well known but it wasn't this as such that caught my attention when looking at it recently. To me, this was a parable about the earth having sufficient resources to supply our needs if they are well managed and administered. The desire to be fed is a basic human need and here we have a large crowd who, having followed Jesus for several days, were no doubt hungry - hungry on several levels: spiritually, physically and certainly hungry out of curiosity. For me, this was an opportunity for Jesus to be a spiritual symbol of the earth that sustains all life. Here, He is able to produce and provide food for those around Him. The loaves and the fish become a sacred embodiment of the body of Jesus that is shared amongst others. This is a Communion service.  The food becomes a symbol of life, faith and of the provision of sustenance. It is a sign of the miraculous wonder of the ability of the earth around us to feed its people. All people are fed by the disciples and there is more that is leftover. This provision of food is well managed. It is amazing that a little can be so very productive and satisfying. This mirrors many ecological or garden habitats and permaculture ideas where the productivity of small area of land can be very high if well managed. This is a lesson against global exploitation and resource depletion.

A concurrent thought flowing along side this for me was about a 'Jesus Supermarket' mentality. Jesus is often seen as The leader, The answer to all problems, The answer to the provision of all our needs. Just like a big shopping trip to a local supermarket where we can buy all that we need to sustain us in our consumerist lifestyle, so we can see Jesus as performing a similar function. This can be good as long as we keep a healthy perspective. Sometimes it can be good to step away from an expectation of getting all we need, to put away the shopping list of requests and take a different look at what it is we really want or need.

What does Christmas mean?

When you sit alone - amongst a landscape of trees that twist, cream and sway in the strong wind that is powering over the hillside - what does Christmas mean? It isn't quite a gale, but the warm buffeting wind has brought greyness and occasional spots of rain to an otherwise bright and sun-filled week. Here I am, sheltered from the turbulence that breathes restlessly around me, feeling the landscape beneath my feet stretch away down the hillside and out towards places where Christmas dwells in homes and towns. The landscape doesn't know Christmas. It gives us the essentials for our life and yet Christmas seems a self-centered indwelling of the human spirit that has no connection with what I am experiencing here. Yet the birth of Jesus, from a cosmological perspective, began the salvation of the earth from the sinfullness of consumerism that may ultimately destroy it. For us humans this highlight of the year is meaningless to the trees around me - they are oblivious to the Christcentric revolution that occured on earth in human culture two thousand years ago. Christmas fails to acknowledge the ecology of our fragile biosphere unlike the more pagan and celtic festivals that honour the rhythm of the seasons and the interdependence of man and nature.

I have, for a few hours, escaped the need to be part of Christmas. I am surrounded by it at work and at home but up here it has changed its meaning. Yet if the message of Christmas is the birth of love, then that is what it does mean to me - love for all those around me and the giving that I partake in signifies that. On days like this I can give myself to the landscape in an offering of presence and awareness that I would like to believe it appreciates. Its gift to me is one of beauty, peace, life, salvation and light. Light. For now, at this one moment in the whole day, the sun has just appeared through the greyness to touch the fields and trees around me with a faint wash of brightness and colour. But as soon as I see blueness between the clouds above it, it begins to fade and the heavy greyness recovers its ground.

* * *

I see two ladybirds on the ground beside me. There have been many this autumn. They look cold and tired.

Worship

A passage on worship taken from "The Coming of the Cosmic Christ" by Matthew Fox that I rather liked:

The Cosmic Christ calls us to renewed worship: "Come to me all you who are burdened by lack of praise, lack of beauty, lack of vision in your lives. Look about you at the starry heavens and the deep, deep sea; at the amazing history that has birthed a home for you on this planet; at the surprise and joy of your existence. Gather together-you and your communities-in the context of this great, cosmic community to rejoice and give thanks. To heal and let go. To enter the dark and deep mysteries, to share the news, to break the bread of the universe and drink blood of the cosmos itself in all its divinity. Be brave. Let your worship make you strong and strong again. Never be bored again. Create yourselves, recreate your worlds, by the news you share and the visions you celebrate. Bring your sense of being microcosm in a vast macrocosm; bring your bodies; bring your play; bring you darkness and your pain. Gather and do not scatter. Learn not to take for granted and learn this together. Become a people. Worship together".

An Uphill Struggle

I am really struggling to find continued reality, realism and authenticity in the day to day outworking of my faith. Why should I bother I often ask myself? I find conflict stressful and yet all through my readings and exploration of my Christian journey I find inescapable conflict between ideas and expressions of belief and faith. My mind struggles to cope with it and I feel I am loosing touch with a sense of belonging. Amidst the life I now lead I feel more withdrawn into an isolated and dwindling sense of the spiritual. I miss church life hugely, but I don't know how to fit back in, I don't want to be in a strongly evangelical expression of the Christian faith. If I am to continue, I must find a way to break down this psychological wall that seems to be being built around me. Otherwise I just feel like giving up and letting life just happen around me. I don't want to do that and yet I can get overwhelmed by it all and the excitement I feel when I do think about things.

I am re-reading "The Cosmic Christ" by Matthew Fox. I love his writings and his viewpoint has helped me a great deal on my faith journey. I don't know if they are totally theologically sound, but they are a great source of inspiration.

Mysticism

Brief paraphase of articles from the website The Wild Things of God which I came across recently and I liked the style of writing. The end indented paragraphs are directly copied text as it was getting too laborious for me to rework them into my own words.

Mysticism - a spirituality of the direct experience of God. It is a knowing, not a belief, and marked by love and joy but not an emotional experience. Marriage of the soul to Christ just as Jesus and God are one. The mystic should be as fully permeated with Christ as God is being fully human and fully divine (by the grace of God). It isn't all about experiences which can come and go but on the lasting experience of God. The believer is transformed into a union with God (via Transformativa?)

The Bible was written by mystics. How can you read it without preconceived perceptions of language, culture. personal history?

We need to have a religion not about Jesus. but OF Jesus - of his knowledge and unconditional love.

Mysticism is about unconditional love - and that could apply to anyone. (1Jn 4:7)

When Jesus declares "I and the Father are one" (Jn 10.30) - in himself is the union of God and humankind - offered to all.

Starting point for mysticism is encountering the Goodness of God - not a conditional 'goodness' but pure Goodness. (Original Blessing, Cosmic Goodness...) Few of us are able to see the infinite goodness around us... (ongoing Divine Creative energy) What has happened?

We need to be as children - v. mystical.

We have been told to accept the contradiction of God is infinite love vs eternal torture in Hell. So we believe it is conditional of our: salvation, works, prayer .... . Dichotomy of heart and head: child's faith in absolute goodness vs adult awareness, intelligence and incompetence.

Let go, let God.

Beware of pride, fear and holding on to experiences. Also loneliness - and a narrow path (I know it all too well)

The idea that God is love but will also torment those who do not accept Jesus is an impossible contradiction and erronness misunderstanding of the gospel. How could a Father punish his children endlessly? It is pointless as it accepts no rehabilitation or healing.

Greek word for 'Eternal' means 'Age' - indefinite but not infinite. God's eternity is not described in the Bible. True eternity = absence of time. ie is part of creation, but God transcends time. God is in time, but he is over time. God is not eternal, he is eternity. To God there is nothing but the NOW.

"Consider this: did you really know what you were doing when you accepted Jesus? How can anyone know what they are really doing in rejecting him, or more accurately, what they perceive to be him? We don't. Forgiveness has been proclaimed."

"Literally dozens of passages of Scripture say that salvation will be universal. All mankind, even all creation, will be saved. The hills shall jump for joy, the trees clap their hands, the lion and lamb lie down together. The rocks and stones will sing praises."

"Does Salvation Mean "Knowing Jesus?"

No. The teaching that Jesus is the only path to salvation, contradicts the teachings of Jesus himself. In the three earlier Synoptic gospels, Jesus never suggests "believing in him" is the criterion for salvation. In fact, Jesus warns that it is not those who call him "Lord," who will enter heaven, but those who live the Kingdom life of love! (Mt. 7.21) In the Judgment scene in Mt. 25.31-46, (far and away the most detailed description of judgment in the Bible), Jesus says that those who do good works, creating a better world for the "least of his brothers," actually do it for him whether they know it or not, and will be blessed with his Presence, while those who do not will suffer "burning" in the age-long fire which we've already discussed. Throughout these first three gospels, Jesus doesn't even care if anyone "knows" him or has "a personal relationship" with him! He cares instead that people embrace his teaching—Good News—that the Kingdom of heaven is here, that God is "Father," that in embracing selfless love, we lose our false self, but gain the whole world.

On the other hand, the later gospel of John presents Jesus as the "Cosmic Christ," who is one with the Father, and called "Word", "Light", "Water of Life", and "the Way." The emphasis has shifted from the teaching to the Teacher, in light of his embodiment of the love of God. This Love is called Christ. When Jesus says, "I am the Way, the Truth, and the Life, no one comes to the Father except by me," (Jn 14:6) he is speaking of his nature as the love of God made visible. It is only by being filled with Divine Love that we can "come to the Father." By whatever name it is given by followers of whatever religion or no religion, it is the same, and it is "the narrow gate" through which all must come. The human identity of its bearer is not what's important; the essential thing is following his example in loving unconditionally, becoming Christ. As he said: This is my commandment, love one another as I have loved you. (Jn.15.12)

Many passages in the apostles' writings at first glance suggest that belief in Jesus is essential. But the Bible never records the apostles using a threat of "damnation" for not accepting the Gospel. Paul's voice speaks especially strongly about universal salvation. Yet Paul also presents Jesus as the "necessary sacrifice" for sin, implying belief in him is mandatory. The reason for this is found in his letters, where he repeatedly explains his dual mission of presenting the Good News to both the Jews and the Gentiles, and adjusting his message to his audiences, "becoming all things to all men." (1 Cor. 9.19-23). His Jewish audiences demanded to know how sacrifice fits into this message, and so, Paul presents Jesus as the only sacrifice needed, the fulfillment of the Law. To Gentiles, he presents the cosmic Christ, "the love of God made visible," (Rm. 8.39) reconciling all things in heaven and earth to the Father through selfless love. (Eph. 1.10-11). "

"The Gospel of John reveals the "Cosmic Christ," that is, Christ is identified not only as Jesus on earth, but as the whole creative and redemptive movement of God throughout space and time. Thus, Christ is the Word which brings everything into existence (1:2-3), the Light that enlightens all humanity, (1:9) the Bread of God that sustains all life, (6:33) and much more."

"Panentheism and Christian Mystical Spirituality:

Most great truths of Christian faith, and perhaps most great truths, period, are expressed as paradox. God is completely One, and yet, Triune and Infinite. Jesus is fully and completely human, but fully divine, as well. Panentheism presents another one: God is completely transcendent, and yet, immanent throughout his Creation. Like the mysteries of Trinity and Incarnation, panentheism is an ancient theological realization.

The Greek Church Fathers referred to the transcendence of God as God's "essence" (ousia) and the immanence of God as his "energies" (energeia). In 553, at the Second Council of Constantinople, the universal Church proclaimed a panentheistic vision of the Trinity, developed from St. Paul's writing in Ephesians: "There is One God and Father from whom all things are, one Lord Jesus Christ through whom all things are, and one Holy Spirit in whom all things are." God is in all things, for they spring from him, and all things are in God, for they subsist in him, yet he transcends all as well as emanates in all. "

Panentheism and other God-views:

Panentheism offers the potential for greater dialogue and communication between Christians and those of other views. Other religions share with Christianity this apprehension of the simultaneous beyondness and hereness of the Ultimate as well, even though they use different terms. Buddhism, for instance, speaks of "the Unmade," "the Unconditioned", "the Void"-that which is beyond all concepts on the one hand, but of "Buddha-nature" the divine potential immanent within all "sentient beings," on the other.

Furthermore, many people who call themselves atheists or agnostics actually are not; many have a strong sense of a spiritual dimension, but simply find the images of a "personal God" an intellectual hurdle. Often this is because of misunderstandings brought about by poorly communicated concepts of a very man-like God (though with extraordinary powers) somewhere "up above," reacting with wild emotions to events in the world. These simplistic images have offended countless people from believing in God, and countless more from being able to trust him deeply. So millions of Christians find themselves adults with dissonant, childish (and often threatening) images of God, and millions of non-religious people have only seen such images and rightly reject them.

The panentheism of the Bible is quite different: it certainly presents God as relating to persons and thus "personal," but also as infinitely beyond personality. To communicate God's infinity, the Bible describes God in many non-personal images as well. Consider a few: Spirit,(Jn 4.24) Sun, (Mal 3:20) Word, (Jn 1:1) Rock, (1Cor 10:4) Fire, (Heb 12:29) Light, (1 Jn 1:5) Waters of Life, (Rev 21.1) Wisdom, (Pr 1.20) and Love. (1 Jn 4:8) Perhaps we should keep in mind that God's "person"-ality is also a metaphor, for (he? she? it? all pronouns fail when contemplating this magnificence!) is as infinitely beyond being a "person" in the traditional sense as the One who created light is beyond being light.

No view of God is larger than the panentheistic view. All other theisms (deism, theism, polytheism, animism, pantheism, atheism) are fragmented theologies compared to panentheism. This is the ground for an inexhaustible faith-that God is present right now, in every cell of our bodies, in every beat of our hearts, in every person, in every star, in every loving thought, birthing every particle of every atom of the entire Creation into a constant stream of existence, the invisible Nothing and Nowhere that brings forth Everything and Everywhere. God in all things and all things in God invites wonder, and wonder invites all to touch God.

Beliefs are not Reality

It's essential to remember that all of these ideas are metaphors. Doctrines, words, concepts, thoughts and pictures all translate, emphasize, reflect, and otherwise point to reality. But no description of reality is the reality it describes. Words and pictures, ideas and doctrines, are not the things they point to. They are distorted indicators, utterly different in kind from what they point to. You can describe a tree in your backyard to me all day long, but until I touch it with my own hands, I can't feel its bark. If description can't communicate the tree-ness of a tree, how much less can words communicate God!

This is important! Challenging ideas are often vital for breaking up entrenched thought patterns and opening the mind. Yet no concept, no matter how inspirational, is that divine reality we seek, anymore than Magritte's pipe is something you can pick up and smoke.

We need to remember that God is the name we use for the Unspeakable. Simply put, the Source of everything is beyond all names. The “Trinity” is a conception of how the Infinite One relates to the phenomenal world of beings, matter, and time, which we call Creation. “The Fall from grace” is another. Other religions have their concepts as well—lila, nirvana, maya. But to latch on to any one of these as “the Truth ” instead of a helpful pointer to truth, is to miss the point entirely! It's like several people pointing to that tree in the backyard and arguing whether the tree has three parts or fifteen parts—or arguing if the leaves are dark green, forest green, or olive.

God cannot be divided. God simply is. The Universe simply is. What is simply is. All our thoughts and concepts divide Is-ness in our minds, and divide our minds from Is-ness.

Awakening is the transition from "religion" with its firm answers, perspectives, and experiences, to realization, the awareness of what IS. Even more important is “Real-ization,” the embodiment of that awareness. The important things in mysticism are not concepts, thoughts, feelings, or even experiences, but the questions and questing for nothing else but this One we call God. Beliefs—in the sense of concepts which must be protected, are not part of Christian mystical life. In this sense, you must not “believe” in God. Instead, just rest in Being. And in being, and being with Being, you rest with God, the Ground of Being. Don't “believe” in the Trinity. Trust the holy and wholly indescribable Reality in whom you “live, move, and have your being”.

The Greek word pisteo is almost always translated “belief” or “faith” in the New Testament. However, it also means trust and is better translated as such. Dare to move from belief to trust.

Slowly, joyfully, lovingly, destroy your concepts and mental images into the burning furnace of just being with the One. Just love what is, seen and unseen. Don't name it. Don't label it. Don't even think about it. Just do what Jesus said: Come as a child.

Living Universe

Reflections based upon an article in Resurgence magazine, No. 256 (Sept/Oct 2009): A Journey of Awakening by Duane Elgin. www.awakeningearth.com

My summary of the main points in the article:

The Universe has usually been perceived as being inert and non-living. This has led to our materialistic, consumerist, unsustainable lifestyles and environmental destruction. What if it were, instead, unified and uniquely alive? This would change our perspective and transform our understanding of the cosmos, the nature of human identity and our evolutionary journey.

1. Where are we? The universe is almost entirely invisible and is continuously regenerated by the flow of large amounts of life energy which include consciousness or a reflective capacity enables systems at every scale to exercise some freedom of choice. It is a living and learning system that is alive, subtle, intelligent, purposeful and free. We need to discover the humility of a living systems perspective to rediscover our home.

2. Who are we?: We live within a living universe that arises, moment by moment, as a unified whole. We are beings the universe inhabits as much as we are beings who inhabit the universe. Our life is inseparable from the aliveness of the living universe. Our aliveness and consciousness extend beyond our biological bodies and reaches into the living universe. Our bodies need soul-growing experiences and we can open to a larger sense of self that connects into the subtle aliveness of the universe.

3. Where are we going: We need big changes to live sustainably. We need to discover a common sense of purpose for pulling the human family together: reduce needless clutter, develop authentic relationships, have meaningful work build caring communities and develop creative expressions.

We need a living universe paradigm and understand that our bodies have biological and cosmic dimensions. We need to communicate with the depths of the universe.

I found this an inspiring and thought provoking article that led on from a housegroup discussion last week where I was talking about the creativity of God within the universe and in creating man and Jesus. Although I might question some of the points made above, I thought the idea of a living universe fell neatly into place within an ecological framework. Could it not be said that the underlying life energy is the spiritual energy of the Creator God with the eco-Holy Spirit enlivening all living things and Jesus the embodiment of the earthen elements (air, fire, water, earth and spirit) in human form.

This next passage is copied from the article 'Christians and Druids' by Richard Thomas (http://druidnetwork.org/en/interfaith/articles/richardthomas.html):

In the beginning, God created the heavens and the earth. The earth was formless and void, and darkness was over the surface of the deep, and the Spirit of God was moving over the surface of the waters.

This is something that most Druids will recognise. The ‘Awen’, or inspiration, is both the driving force of the creation, and is also responsible for its beginnings. One of the central features of Druidry, the desire to understand the energy of life itself, to honour ‘Awen’ and to draw it into oneself, is also a central feature of Christianity. The language is different, but the meaning is strikingly similar. This is prayer, and prayer, for each of us, is a desire to enter into the sacred, the divine heart of the Universe. For each of us, prayer can be song or silence, action or stillness. For each of us, it is a sacred space where we are called into a relationship with the sacred.

So from the very first words of scripture, Christians and Druids begin to find common ground. The ‘Breath of God’, the Inspiration, the ‘Awen’, moves across the darkness and chaos of matter. Those two small words, ‘moved upon’, barely reflect the strength of the original Hebrew. They are words of storm and power, and reflect an imagery that itself creates movement and response. The language is both mystic and sexual – the Spirit of God penetrates the chaos of unformed matter, inseminating it, bringing it to life. These same ideas are echoed at the start of the New Testament, when the Spirit of God ‘overshadows’ Mary, bringing about a conception that is both human and divine. And so Christians, as well as Druids, can understand the formation of our universe as a form of birth. We can speak of the Spirit of God making chaos pregnant with meaning, form and purpose. We can speak of the dark warm woods, the wild animals, the buzzing insects, even the great seas and mountains, as both spirit and matter: rich and pregnant with the divine nature. Druids and Christians have common ground not simply because we share the same humanity, but because we have a similar understanding of our nature: we are creatures of both matter and spirit. And in speaking of the things that are sacred, our spirits reach out together towards this ‘something’ that is common to us both.

Both of these two explorations of the nature of the universe seem to have much in common and speak of connections and interconnections between ourselves and the universe that surrounds us. I am left with wondering how a purely evangelical Christian perspective might fit into the equation. With an emphasis on a mostly paternalistic God, required personal relationships with the Trinity; literal Biblical interpretation and sinner/saved duality, something somewhere seems to have lost the beauty, mystery and magic that is present in this great created cosmic creation in which we find ourselves. Both passages also speak to me in a language that I can understand and relate to and it is a great joy to find writers who can express thoughts and ideas in such a way. There is a weaving of words, ideas, story, history, nature, mysticism, possibility and creativity that allows room for one to reach out into the realm of personal exploration without the anticipation of judgement or wrongdoing. This is my spiritual path and from time to time it draws me in to explore inwardly and outwardly - to connect with myself and with all that exists around me.

One query I have is how much of our body, consciousness, soul or whatever exists externally to our physical bodies. The first passage alluded to this and I come across it from time to time - is it energy, an aura, prayer....?

The Vine

The Vine
Reflections on the sermon given at Stopsley Baptist Church on Sunday 6 September 2009


Building a church based on New Testament principles.
What does the word church really mean to us and how can we engage with a new vision of the meaning of church in our lives? If the we take the definition of church to become one that is a body of people, and the physical building that we all call church becomes a community centre, how will that change the way Christians relate to others within their own body and with those in the wider community at large? How will it effect their relationship with Christ?

Some people may immediately wonder how much more is it possible to do because, surely, SBC is already a very missional and many members are active in the local community. Others may be so tied down to work and family responsibilities that forming a more outward perspective may be hard. Others may be terrified at the thought that it may involve loosing security and comfort.

I suppose alot of it depends on your relationship with God and your spirituality. If going to church on a Sunday fulfills your needs and this is your "God time" then that is Ok. I've no idea how many, but I expect a large proportion of the church do take their Christianity seriously enough to give it a certain amount of attention over the rest of the week. Some, at the extreme end - and I am one of those - may find Sunday church to be the time when they can feel distant from God because little there relates to their own experiencial perspective of God.

I liked the illustration of church being a interlinking network of elements rather than being and isolated box in the darkness. A very ecological perspective! All of nature is an interconnected set of systems and processes where nothing exists in isolation. These connections enable life to exist and perpetuate. I'd even say that inanimate objects have their place and form part of the ecosphere. An analogy was used regarding the potential of an acorn that contains all that is needed to produce an oak tree. When an acorn begins its journey of transformation it won't even start to grow unless it has various combinations of light or darkness, heat or cold, water, oxygen, time.... A gardener may love his acorn that he holds carefully in his hand, but unless he does something with it it will not release the potential locked up inside. God, the ultimate gardener and carer for his vine, Jesus, would have expected even him to bear fruit. I wonder how Jesus felt and how he was pruned? To me, faith cannot just be a "Jesus loves me, I'm alright" affair. I can't just be an acorn thinking that all is alright and that I'll grow into a magnificent tree. I need earth, light, energy and a habitat in which I will thrive.

Church should very much be the framework of people and community networks in which we relate to the world around us. It should be everything from formal meetings and home groups to social networks and work structures. I would call the times I spend with friends drumming around a log fire 'church'. It is there that we meet, share, talk, pray, realise intentions, seek guidance and value fellowship in a safe and unthreatening environment. We can be who we want to be, we can sit beside differing beliefs and share a welcoming smile. It isn't a 'Christian' group, but for me that doesn't matter. I can take it on my own level and be enriched in ways that are meaningful to me.

The Vine (John 15:1-7)
There was a quote along the lines of "Fruit bearing is not a human possibility; it is Christ's work through us". This seems to imply that you may not really be able to bear fruit unless you are a Christian. It also contains the idea of original sin which I struggle with - I am more of an "original blessing" sort of person (see Matthew Fox's work on the subject). Many people bear fruit and having a diversity of "vines" keeps a well balanced system in order as happens in nature. Rely too much on one thing and the whole ecosystem can collapse. Nature always promotes and thrives on variety, whereas monoculture needs an unhealthy input of unnatural elements to make it work. If we remove ourselves from the ecosystem that supports us, we will not last very long. We need to belong. Jesus' anaology here with how systems are found in nature is something I hadn't really seen before. "Remain in me" (John 15:4) belongs in quite an ecocentric passage, for it warns about the dangers of ignoring that which sustains us, supports us and gives us life. From a Cosmic Christ point of view, we ignore Christ, the animating Spirit of the Earth, at our peril.

Being and Doing
How should we go about "Being and Doing Church"? I am sure there is much that could be drawn out of that phrase...

I face a huge battle personally with the concepts of being and doing in my life. Half of me is always wanting to be "doing" something: gardening, walking, cycling, working, exploring personal development ideas, being dissatisfied with where I am at and getting depressed at not being like others whom I perceive as more successful. Then there is the quiet "being" half which is the mystical, quiet, listening, observing, meditating, solitary, nature aware spiritual side. The two always seem to be antagonistic with each other. Getting the 'being' balance right is hard because taken to its extreme you could 'be' so much and exist in such a state of relaxed ease and contentment with the present that you would never get out of bed in the morning. How you go about being active for your faith, missional, a learner and a disciple in a state of being rather than doing would probably provoke an interesting discussion at a workshop or talk on the issue. I think that it is a core principle of much Celtic spirituality and personal development work and is an interesting area which I find fascinating and could go on for hours about.

Is God a plant?

I've just finished reading 'The Voice of the Earth - an exploration of ecopsychology' by Theodore Roszak (Phanes Press, 2001). A big juicy book that delved into the realm of psychology, ecology and an exploration of ideas into how we came into existence on this earth and where we might be going.

To be honest, much of the book was too deep for me and difficult to absorb in many places. I have often said that the subject of ecopsychology interests me, but the book did reveal how I only understand it at a very superficial level. Without a deeper and more technical understanding of Freud, Jung and psychology in general I just have to take what bits I can understand and see how it adds to my awareness of an ecological self. I am, though, glad I read the book as it was quite enlightening in parts. And odd bits of it will sink into my thoughts and writings anyway.

It is a big question - does our mind exist solely within us or is does it somehow have a wider field of operation? Is there a wider creative 'mind' that belongs in the universe? And do the two minds have any interraction?

When I look at the plant life around me, and then consider the fact that throughout the whole of creation humans have only occupied a small timeframe of existence in Gaia, then I wonder how human-like that cosmological creative spirit might be. Does a humancentric idea of "God" reinforce the ecological separation that we face in our lives - the paternalistic industrialisation of society, consumerism of desirables, ecological unsustainability, financial greed and political and social instability? Is God a plant? A bizarre question indeed but, at a superficial level, if the world has a creator God then it must surely have some 'plant' characteristics. After all, we humans have only appeared on the earth in the last tiny fraction of the time it has existed.

I know I keep struggling with all this God stuff and keep looking for ways to help me frame an understanding. Sometimes I think I have I have it all sorted but then something will happen or someone will say something that gets me questioning again. Should I bother thinking about it? Is it ultimately all a waste of time? No, I think not. I have my time here on this green planet and I should respect both as a gift to me. When I look around me all the things I see people believe, I don't see one set of people who have obviously got it right at the expense of all the others. I see people who do amazing things because of their deep beliefs - whatever their religion. If my belief system can empower me to do value things in my life, then that is a place I want to be in.

My mind seems very much attuned to the ecology and presence of plants. I'm not an animals person, nor an insect person, and nor at times a human person. But stick me amongst plants and I feel very much at home. They inhabit a very different world to the one in which we live and one that I can only observe from the outside. I admire people who know a lot about the folklore of plants and have learnt to work with them.

When I awake my ecological self and take my mind of the busyness of work, family and all that is going on around me, I feel a deep sense of peace and belonging in the journey that I am walking. It feels like a return to home, but also to a place of deep mystery, challenge and unknowing. At times it may feel like a refuge, but at times it feels like entering a den of lions.

How do you bring about global change and environmental respect to diverse cultures where there is little awareness of a personal responsibility to the environment? I don't know whether we have the ability to do that. With so many people striving to work, repay mortgages, own cars, shop more, compete for jobs, seek western affluence, satisfy personal 'wants', fit into business, political and social structures etc, there may be little time for more 'earthly' needs - whatever they may be.

Not sure if this is all very coherent.... I just wanted to jot down a few things.

Nature: Living Bible

A note in my sketchbook. I'm re-reading Original Blessing by Matthew Fox and his ideas on Creation Spirituality. It's premise is basically that the earth was made originally good and the fall/redemption ideology has distorted the concept of the Divine creative energy that God imbued in creation. It is quite a liberal theology but I love it. I'd like to expand on it more here at some stage but I don't really was to just repeat large chunks of the books here. I'd love to study it further as it does actually want to make me take a deeper look at the Bible, but getting my head around deep theology isn't easy.

It is hard for us to understand the entirety of the created cosmos. I am not a creationist (literal 7 days to create the earth) and quite happy with idea that the earth has been around for millions of years quietly getting on with the process of creation. Hmm, perhaps Creation is a better word for Evolution as I am not sure that the latter fully encompasses the entirely process of Earth's development. From that perspective the recent Christocentric time frame within we seem to place much of our history and development seems almost inconsequential. If God's creative energy has been at work for so long in forming the earth that nourishes plant roots, the butterflies that dance in summer sunshine and clouds that bring rain to the mountain streams; then are we humans not the most arrogant, self-centered and destructive life forms to walk upon this fragile land?

Can Nature be my Living Bible?

How can I enter a truly authentic mystical faith that draws up nature and Creation for its Being?

And, possibly more interestingly, how can I find people that share similar ideas? The internet is fine as a starting point but it lacks proper personal contact. I am not sure I am ready to return to our church yet so I do feel a bit isolated. Perhaps i should start a group... or do something... or just scream with frustration!

The Warrior God

I have always had a problem with the 'Warrior', 'Battle' and 'Army' language used in Christian terminology. Its use is stong, common and possibly increasing. I find it aggressive, self-centered, insensitive and disrespectful of 'non-believers'. I don't doubt that there may be battles to be had against the 'spirits of darkness', but I'm not going to dwell on this particular thought today (as I can't deal with it).

I came across some writing a while ago that differentiated between warriors and hunters and I have been thinking about it in the light of my current blogs and the 'Wild at Heart' men's course I am on at church. Warriors rampage into battle regardless of who they kill, where as a hunter reveres its prey, undertands it and takes only what is needed. According the the 'Wild at Heart' course, Jesus was a warrior. My only purpose supposedly here in life, as it emphasises whilst the men on the DVD play at clay pigeon shooting with their rifles, is to claim the ground for Jesus, fight the battle against Satan and be a warrior for God. After all, the Bible is full of people going to war, and that is what God wanted then, and wants of me now. Jesus was not meek and mild, he was a warrior.

But...

I'd rather be a hunter. Know my enemy, know myself, know my environment, know my strengths and weaknesses, know my enemies strengths and weaknesses, tread silently, stealthily, and pounce when the time was right. Well, sort of.

Sooo....

Out of the box thinking:
If, as I pondered in my last blog, God was Nature then Nature must be a warrior. I've talked about plants (and other animals) colonising land and growing rapidly - are they on a mission to take over the planet? Are we in the way? Are we their enemy? If God is Nature, does that include us humans, or are we separate from the 'others'? Humans are definately set apart in many ways and if there is this division that, possibly the Holy Spirit bridges, then what other questions does it raise? And Nature has many seeming cruel facets within itself and towards humans (viruses, mosquitos, earthquakes.... etc). It isn't all just a pretty 'God made the world, isn't it beautiful' sort of thing.

OK, I am just enjoying a run of thinking a few things that I find interesting. I am not advocating them as facts, true or the basis of a belief system. It is just fun to have few things running through my mind at the moment.

Next thought please....!

The Language of Nature

The March/April 2008 edition of 'Resurgence' magazine has an interesting article about the language of nature by Liz Hosken (www.gaiafoundation.org):

... Our fragmented thinking, which denies the primacy of the earth as the source of all life, is now our greatest impediment in meeting the challenge of the moment... ... The great challenge that climate change presents the Western industrial mind is to learn the language of the earth... ...reconnect with the natural world, her cycles, abundance and intelligence... ... the Earth is understood as the primary source of nourishment and meaning... ... we need to reconnect with the poetic language of the imagination through which we can feel for those other than ourselves and our own species...

In 'Animate Earth' Stephan Harding writes:

...the human organism is inherently predisposed to seeing nature as alive and full of soul, and that we repress this fundamental mode of perception at the expense of our own health, and that of the natural world.

He also quotes Thomas Berry as saying "Nature... is a communion of subjects rather than a collection of objects".

A couple of weeks ago I put some canes up against a fence by the summerhouse for the bindweed to grow up. To see this plant twist around the cane at almost a foot a day was amazing. The vigor and compulsion that this plant has to grow is amazing. I encourage it to grow up the garden fence as I love its white trumpet like flowers and its heart shaped leaves. It produces a rapid wall of green. In the time it has taken the bindweed to grow 6ft, my carrots have grown about 1cm!

A couple of days ago I was walking near work and looked at the areas of trees and shrubs growing in and around the industrial estate - taking hold and colonizing the small unwanted patches of land between roads, car parks and warehouses.

Nature takes hold. It has its own agenda - to grow, to spread out, to reproduce, to seed, to expand its own kind. Does each individual plant have its own will to live, or is there some inherent 'consciousness' that pervades the whole of the plant world. There is obviously a network of interrelationships between plants (and others) of the same and different species as can be seen in any ' wild' ecosystem when nature has freedom to establish herself. Does this happen purely by chance, or by a process of evolution?

When I stand in a patch of woodland, in the garden, in an orchard full of blossom or a field of corn waving in a breeze and sense a deep silent movement of life around me, am I just anthropomorphosising what I see - projecting a wishful sense of joy of my own life and emotions onto the life around me? Does nature have a language that it uses to talk amongst itself and am I tapping into a whisper of that language caught by my soul? Many people claim to be able communicate with nature though a variety of means (spirits, devas, gods etc) but that path isn't for me. Perhaps it is intuition that catches my psyche. The language that Nature uses, if it has one may be one we will never actually be able to communicate with. But, if we are evolved from similar cells way, way back in the past perhaps we have a vestigial gene somewhere that calls to us in rare moments. But perhaps we don't have to look that far back when we realise that it was only around 200 years ago that our whole world was still predominantly rural, agrarian and nature-centric.

Living in a town and having to commute by car to work in an office all day makes trying to tap into the language of nature a challenge. It takes time for me to try and tune it. Even when I am out for a walk or a bike ride and I only have a few hours seems almost too little time to sense the rhythm of nature around me. I need to slow down and enter the pace of nature - to begin to tune into her language. I only feel I can do so in the way that means something to me. Sometime you get special moments when nature seems to reach out to you and realy inspire you. This is when I feel I have my awareness of the Divine Spirit. Ooo! Er.. soooo... as those last few words seemed to come from no-where.... perhaps it is... the Holy Spirit that.... for me... acts like a translation service between nature and myself. It is a bridge between me and my belonging in nature. That might need a bit of thinking about.....! So is God actually Nature. Is God the essense, the life force, the actual Language of Nature.... Hmmm.... this is too difficult to think about now...

Spring Blessings.

Wisdom and Understanding

Notes for a prayer meeting in 2006

Wisdom: experience and knowledge, insight and practical judgement.

Understanding: perceive the meaning of, nature of, cause of; know how to deal with, agreed upon.

In this passage there is a sense of creation, not in the physical sense, but I a more psychological one - a sense that seeks meaning behind the action of creation. It is not suggesting answers to the great questions of creation, but asks us to accept what we see and try and sense the spirit in which it happened.

The more knowledge and wisdom you have does not always imply you can solve problems. More may remain unanswered because you have to accept that ‘the more you know, the less you know’. It may take you to a place where you are more happy because you have to accept the many unanswered mysteries - the world will remain a place with the unknown.
Wisdom and understanding implies that a time has to be spent living through a period whereby these qualities are fed by experience and learning. You have to go through the past in order to be in the present. You just expect ‘to get it’ in a microsecond - we all have to live and learn. The greatest period where Divine Wisdom and Understanding was birthed is beyond our small comprehension of time and space.

Receiving wisdom and understanding:
We have all been inspired by someone, taught by a teacher, mentored by a friend, followed the example of Jesus etc. And so we become a reflection of that person in some small or greater way as we aspire to their path and vision. If the earth has received Divine Wisdom and Understanding then it, too, must reflect that back. In all that we see around us we must see or sense a reflection of the Creator. It should tell us something about the creation process - about the pain and struggle, the beauty and wonder.

It should draw us nearer the Creator.

But can you hug trees or carry a stone in your pocket?

I walk out into the coolness of the garden after a warm spring day and kneel down on the soft grass to take in the fragrance of the wallflowers that fills the darkening sky. How can something so simple create such a beautiful presence?
I look around. Wisdom and understanding is all around me - an ancient spirit that entwines all things, long before our greedy souls clung to this fragile earth and devoured it to feed our selfish lives.

Boundaries and Freedom

Some writing from June 2005
This is a passage about boundaries and freedom. God created the world and this gives impression of a set of constraints put upon it. A sense of a great eternal movement set in motion by God and which cannot be changed by anything we do.

And yet within that there is a sense of freedom that we are able to search for a sense of belonging. Who are we? What are we doing here? Is there a God? How do I make sense of the world around me? We try to find something that is greater than us - something that all cultures throughout the world have done and which seems to be an inherent part of our make up throughout history. We are all feeling our way towards him. But God is not far off, he is close, in fact we are within God, in all we do. All too often Christians seems to feel they can hop in and out of God’s presence. That seems an odd concept. It is our awareness of the Divine that we need to tune in to. That awareness must surely be without boundaries.

So do we have boundaries and freedom. What boundaries do we create and what freedoms do we have? How do they relate to your life? Are we free to search for God or are we limited by boundaries that we put up?

Struggling with Evangelical Christianity

This post continues on from the previous one, Raindrops on Croft Ambrey with some notes I made in July 2005. It expresses much of a personal struggle that I was having with the Christian environment I was in.

this was a time of conscious awareness of the natural world : I was open to its being : this was the ultimate in divine awareness : beyond anything I get at ‘Christian events’ : emotive superficial candy floss : triumphal salvation pains me : it threatens my soul because it cannot relate to it : guilt and hell are imposed or implied : how can this be of God the soul asks? : this is just human egotistical plundering of the Word : domination of the masses : individuality is hidden : individuality becomes the occult : hidden : unseen : the mystery that cannot be explained by conventional thought : how do you reconcile these things? : you are being judged on the way that you perceive the world : how can ‘difference’ be forcefully unified by the cross? : why do people want you to believe and behave in a certain way? : if you break the mould you are fallen and in need of direction back onto the path : The 'MAYBE' is the key to my walk : break from fundamentalism : and embrace the unknown : the Cosmic God : embrace a healing of the world : man is destroying it : if Jesus is the only way to save it then that is a supernatural /cosmic event : if we destroy the planet we are saying we don’t care about it : we don’t respect it : we show no respect for human life : if we show no respect to the earth then that says everything is Godless : defining the earth in terms of a spiritual/Divine being is defining it as a Divine creation : if created by the Divine it has a Divine Spirit : it may not actually be God : if I make a picture, the picture isn’t me : but there must be a way of expressing the divine through it : the gaia theory goes someway to express the way that I believe all is connected : we are in some way part of a big organism : man isn’t separate from it : without the earth he would die : he has to maintain an integral part of it : through food, water, light, air etc : the earth has an in-built ability to support us : it can also kill us : there must be a balance : perhaps not a physical balance : but a balance exists that is favourable to our existence : the continuation of that balance is for us to maintain : there may well need to be catastrophes and diseases that help maintain this balance : they occur simply because the earth is made that way ; the great direction in which we move : is it beneficial to the earth or to man? : what is our motivation? : ego : self-satisfaction : can Christianity really save the human race? : not yet

the Christian problem : redemption of a fallen world : taken for granted : but is it fallen? : how de we define fallen? : the earth was created good and it maintains its goodness : humans have corrupted : they are fallen : salvation may not just be deciding to follow Christ : perhaps the greatest salvation is a personal awakening to the spirit of the earth : an awakening to the nature around us : to the people around us : to our ecology : that to me has been the greatest realisation : it has affected the soul : it has affected who I am

what do you say when you find you can’t relate to the Christian world around you : is it that you have drifted away? : or have you actually seen the light? : perhaps the greatest message of all is dying to self and rebirthing your soul : the main biblical thrust is people orientated : love : personal relationship to God : I would say I have these more strongly than ever before : but it is not through worship of Jesus : he is a gate : arms open wide : like a gate to a field : come and touch nature : or is this all heretical and off the mark? : what was the purpose of those ancient cultures in creating the biblical stories? : the stories are odd in that they are so people centered : what would the cultures gain by having a personal figure like Jesus? : as many people today are skilled in people skills and blind to nature : perhaps these stories are one-sided : perhaps they have a skewed perspective of the earth : to control people you have to have social ideologies : perhaps the stories were built around a society of people people, not nature people :

how do you go forward when you are faced with such a dilema - evangelical mainstream belief and the fear of not wanting to do anything that doesn’t fit the ‘Bible says so’ metality, and a deep soul awakening to the belonging in nature : problem : perhaps you can theorise all day long and never find the answer – only one's personal journey of reality will guide you : do you give up and meekly accept Christ and the Bible : or do you journey and seek challenges and an anticipated more enlightened way of living : making a commitment does not seem enlightening to me : perhaps it once was : now it seems inappropriate : a ‘welcome to your journey’ would be better : I want to learn more about God : I want to see more of God : but I know that my experiences and perceptions are different to those around me : either I am missing out on something obvious or else I too interpret things around me, but in a different way : perhaps my experience of God is stronger than other peoples but I view it differently : now there is a thought : I see people expressing their Christianity in terms of the biblical language before them but are they just drawing on the Bible for their foundation and belief and language :

How would Jesus be any different from popular Charismatic Christians of today? : in what sense should we be like Him? : are we supposed to get so close that we believe we live out our lives as an exact replica of His – according to the exaltations of our leaders? : we are channelled into the Bible as the only revelation of God’s word : the only direct one : so can no-one else have any way of being open to God and expressing their connection to God through their words? : woe betide anyone who falters by the wayside or walks a different path : where is the God of love in that? : perhaps the father concept : as a father disciplines his child : as I discipline Emily : discipline yes, blinker, no :

And dealing with people is my greatest burden : I seek balance : yet it can be hard to find : particularly in my work environment : I feel restricted : no freedom to be who I am : creativity is stifled : I am a slave to the computer and my work : I am in a cage and want to be free : but at the moment the necessities of family and home life mean work is essential : my soul doesn’t have the courage to break free on its own : I must ask for freedom : I must ask for guidance : I must ask for God to hold my hand :

In my struggles I must see the positive : I must see the Divine : I must see the hope : I must see the love : I must see the bigger picture : I must not criticise : I must be open : I must control the ego : I must look beyond the outer and seek the soul : I must be in touch : I must embrace the world