Radnor Forest Willows

I have to stop. I am unable to go on. It seems as if this place has forced me to stand in its presence. I have cycled through a large area of conifer plantation in the Radnor Forest on the Welsh border and now I have emerged to a place where the trees uphill to the left of me have been felled and the hill drops steeply down though open fields to the right. Along this edge of the forest road is a row of windswept and almost leafless Goat Willows that stand in contrast to the monoculture around me. They seem an unusual find, and somehow out of place here. 

The cool wind is loud in their branches and I shelter in front of a pile of felled timber and sit and wait. Why was I called to stop here? Somehow my initial thoughts on arriving here were evocative of a cold and frosty winter's day. Is there something of a memory that is tied up here with childhood memories  and my father? Am I just recalling an unidentifiable moment from the long distant past?

I almost feel a heaviness - a pity for these these beautiful trees that have for so long been hidden from the true light of day by towering conifers and which now lie fully exposed to the elements on this east side of the hill. Perhaps it's the sound, the deep song of the branches that ebbs and flows so slowly - like the movements in my qigong. Nature may just be saying "stop, and just observe me". I'm on a long bike ride and haven't much time to stop and dwell in one place. Here I am given the opportunity to do so.

I do some meditation before I get too cold and just absorb into my senses this unexpected special place which others would just pass by. I give thanks to the place.

Awen, Chi and the Holy Spirit

As I begin a course in Qigong exercises, which I hope will be beneficial to me in several ways, it has set me pondering on a few wayward thoughts. Something seems to have made a few connections as I try and embrace meditation, exercise, sacred space, healing, nature awareness and work/life balance. I'll probably write more in the future but, as an initial exercise, I did a quick web search to find some definitions of the three main ideas about 'spirit' that I now seem to have an interest in. I withhold any form of comment or analysis for the time being.

AWEN

The word comes from a proto-Brittonic root for breath and breathing connecting well with the same sense in the English word inspiration. In the Middle Ages bardic scholars held that 'awen' came directly from God, from Ysbryd Glân, the Holy Spirit. (druidnetwork.org)

'Awen' derives from the Indo-European root "uel", which means 'to blow', which is the same root as the Welsh word 'Awel' which means 'breeze'. Awen is the breath of the divine which gives inspiration; the wind of the spirit. (celtic-tattoo.net)

Awen is a Welsh word for "(poetic) inspiration". It is historically used to describe the divine inspiration of bards in the Welsh poetic tradition. Someone who is inspired, as a poet or a soothsayer, is an awenydd.  ....   Awen derives from the Indo-European root *-uel, meaning 'to blow', and has the same root as the Welsh word awel meaning 'breeze'. There is a parallel word to 'awen' in Irish, ai, also meaning "poetic inspiration" which derives from the same ancient root.  .....   It is also said that the Awen stands for not simply inspiration, but for inspiration of truth; without Awen one cannot proclaim truth. The three foundations of Awen are the understanding of truth, the love of truth, and the maintaining of truth. (en.wikipedia.org)

QI (CHI)

The ancient Chinese described it as "life-force". They believed qi permeated everything and linked their surroundings together. They likened it to the flow of energy around and through the body, forming a cohesive and functioning unit. By understanding its rhythm and flow they believed they could guide exercises and treatments to provide stability and longevity. (en.wikipedia.org)

HOLY SPIRIT

The Greek word "Pneuma" generally refers to spirit and is found around 385 times in the New Testament, with some scholars differing by 3 to 9 occurrences.[12][13] These usages vary, e.g. in 133 cases it refers to spirit in the general sense, 153 cases to spiritual and possibly 93 times in reference to the Holy Spirit.[12] In a few cases it is also used to mean wind or life.[12] (en.wikipedia.org)

In the Tanakh, the word ruach generally means wind, breath, mind, spirit. In a living creature (nephesh chayah), the ruach is the breath, whether of animals (Gen 7:15; Psa 104:25, 29) or mankind (Isa 42:5; Ezek 37:5). God is the creator of ruach: "The ruach of God (from God) is in my nostrils" (Job 27:3). In God's hand is the ruach of all mankind (Job 12:10; Isa 42:5). In mankind, ruach further denotes the principle of life that possesses reason, will, and conscience. The ruach imparts the divine image to man, and constitutes the animating dynamic which results in man's nephesh as the subject of personal life. ... When applied to God, the word Ruach indicates creative activity (Gen 1:2) and active power (Isa 40:13). The Spirit of God also works in providence (Job 33:4; Psa 104:30), in redemption (Ezek 11:19; Ezek 36:26-27), in upholding and guiding his chosen ones (Neh 9:20; Psa 143:10; Hag 2:5), and in the empowering of the Messiah (Isa 11:2; Isa 42:1; Isa 61:1).  ... In short, as the ruach is to the created nephesh, so the Ruach Elohim is to God Himself, part of God and identified with God. Ruach may be understood as the Author of the animating dynamic of the created order, the underlying Principle of creation, and the One that imparts the nephesh to the entire universe. (www.hebrew4christians.com)

Understanding the OT terms “Holy Spirit” and “the Spirit of God (or the LORD)” and the theology associated with them depends on grasping the significance of the fact that, in about 40% of its occurrences, the Hebrew word “spirit” (ruakh) basically means “wind or breath,” not “spirit.” The NT word (pneuma) is also used in this way on occasion. And when these Hebrew and Greek words mean “spirit,” the reference is often to the human “spirit.” Furthermore, certain passages draw out the correspondence between the Spirit of God and the human spirit, and the importance of God’s work through this correspondence (e.g., 1 Cor. 2:10-12). The Spirit of God is the person of God that vivifies the spirit of people to God (Ezek 37; Rom 8:16). The baptism of the Spirit shifts the metaphor from “wind” to “water,” the point being that physical purification by water has a corresponding reality in the purification of the human spirit through the Holy Spirit (Matt 3:11; John 1:32-34; Ezek 36). Similarly, like physical water, one can drink of the Spirit as water that gives life to the human spirit (e.g., John 7:37-39). The Holy Spirit did all of these things for both Old and New Testament believers, so in this sense the Holy Spirit not only indwells NT believers, but also did something similar in the lives of OT believers. (bible.org/seriespage/holy-spirit-hebrew-bible-and-its-connections-new-testament)

"Is the Holy Spirit our Divine Mother? - If the experiences of the Holy Spirit are grasped as being a ‘rebirth’ or a ‘being born anew’, this suggests an image for the Holy Spirit which was quite familiar in the early years of Christianity, especially in Syria, but got lost in the patriarchal empire of Rome: the image of the mother. If believers are ‘born’ of the Holy Spirit, then we have to think of the Spirit as the ‘mother’ of believers, and in this sense as a feminine Spirit. If the Holy Spirit is the Comforter, as the Gospel of John understands the Paraclete to be, then she comforts ‘as a mother comforts’ [cf.. John 14.26 with Isa 66.13). In this case the Spirit is the motherly comforter of her children. Linguistically this brings out the feminine form of Yahweh’s ruach in Hebrew. Spirit is feminine in Hebrew, neuter in Greek, and masculine in Latin and German.” (www.adishakti.org/_/term_spirit_translates_the_hebrew.htm)

Apples

The late summer sunshine gathered in the dappled colours of the orchard. Cool green shadows, dew-laden grass and scattered apples belonged patiently in an autumnal morning. She walked silently, thoughtfully and sensingly. This was a place in which to give thanks and this is what had brought her here. Here she could see the fruits of the Awen before her. She knelt to the ground and selected a fruit that seemed to catch her eye. It seemed to reflect the whole of the orchard in its presence. The mottled reds and greens of its skin danced in harmony with those of the fallen leaves that sprinkled the ground around her. With thanks, she held the apple up to the sky and here the whole earth become embodied in this single, beautiful fruit. Creation, energy, life, desire - intertwined with the Divine. The earth became the fruit and the fruit became the earth. Round and fragrant, full of promise and goodness. Yet, at the back of her mind, as she brought the apple to her soft lips she remembered the tale of her sister Eve and the temptation that could only have come as she sought the presence of God. To eat the apple was to taste the goodness of God. How could God forbid the taste of His original blessing? As her mouth drew upon the fruit of the Divine garden her senses cascaded with delight. The earth tasted so good.. Here was the ultimate creation, here was a Divine blessing.

The apple tree stood and watched, it was after all, part of the narrative. And yet it remained unchanged. The Creator; standing, laden with more tempting delights as if giving an offering to the earth, sacrificing itself for the wondrous delights of its fruit.

She stood and gazed at the tree and gave it a whispered thanks. She extended a hand to a laden bough and welcomed a delicate touch of the aged bark. Together, the two of them, brought together by a single apple, a union of understanding. How could this be wrong? Both had been given life, a cosmic life. There could be no separation for each belonged to each other.

But few understood.

Greenbelt 2011 Notes

I went to the Greenbelt Festival again this year and, as usual, it was overflowing with things to see and hear. I was only there for the Friday evening and all day Saturday and so had to make the most of limited time to find things that I was inspired by as well as try and entertain the family. I booked a chat with a spiritual director who gave me one or two things to ponder over and the main thing that I valued was being in an environment with so many ideas and varying perspectives on the Christian faith. Quite a few speakers where very inspiring but there wasn't really time to try and engage with them after their talks other than a quickly grasped 'thank you'. For once I didn't feel isolated, but felt at home with similar nature aware souls.


I made a few notes and I've just type them up here with no effort to sort them out or untangle any knots so they may not make sense but will aid memory and initiate thoughts at a later date. Accuracy is not guaranteed!

John Bell: Faultlines and Phantases

Suffering and environmental disasters - why does God let it happen? Jesus does not equate sin with the cause of personal suffering. Our world has fault lines - the world was not created as perfect but 'Good'. There is rock and there is sand. Structures can collapse, but not because of sin. Even Jesus ends up in a boat in a storm. The world is not inherently evil. Faith is not an insurance policy. Environmental disasters are a necessary discord in the earth. Discord is part of a symphony. Nature is not the enemy - we have to deal with a world that has dangers. We are quite comfortable here in this country and yet we complain about the weather as if it we were a major disaster. We are not always tuned in to the song of the earth. Nature and God co-exist in a covenantal relationship. God promises not to destroy the earth (rainbow)- the rainbow is a symbol of war - that God will not destroy the earth with his own weapon. Nature's disasters can be caused by humans not living in harmony with the natural world. Nature is not at fault so don't blame it. God says humanity is 'Good' but not ' perfect'.

We have to be connected with those who are outside of us: disconnected or in pain. Sometimes we can puzzle about things that have no answer but the mystery will loose its fear when are touched by those things. Jesus does not cure everyone. He does not avoid pain. Saying sin causes pain is abhorrent to Jesus. Jesus has no time for that. If we say God is unfair we are distracting ourselves from that pain.

But what about intentional harm: drunk drivers, paedophiles, rioters... A consequence of being human? Good people get hurt and killed - insolvable mystery. God does not bail people. God does not side with presumed victors. People who persue [Christian] victory at all costs, God will not bail them out if things go wrong... (?).

 Rioting: not condone it, but society is ruled by the £ and consumerism. Rioters will end up in gaol but the financial institutions won't. bankers walk away with millions - no wonder people want their share too of the goods. Financial obesity - no cure sought. We are bound to consumerism.

God enlarges the hearts of those who do not know the answers but ask questions. God might enable pain to heal others. Jesus came into the world to enable us to live with all people - the well, sick. persecuted etc. Jesus enters our dilemma to live with hope in an imperfect world.

Alan Mann: Allotment Atonement

Community/social inclusion/justice for the good. About atonement - people:earth:God. Relationships - bringing something of our connection with God. Atonement: something done by God for us, and done by us for others [healing of God's relationship with humans after the fall in Garden of Eden when man disobeyed God]. Allotment: gateway to a wider connection to the earth. We are human from the ground up - Hebrew for 'human' similar to the word 'ground'. We cannot be 'at one' [at -one-ment] if we are not grounded in the land  need to be reconciled with the earth and with God. Fear of failing - nature might beat me if things don't grow - it wins. If reconnect with earth then reconnect with people as well. Soil is not against us - need to work with its goodness. it is 'good'. Genesis - tend the garden. Spirit of God gives life to the earth. God reconciles us to the earth - at one with creation. Interrelatedness.

What is our connection with the earth?: sense of belonging [me], foraging, practical, peace, gardening, wholeness, special, magical, form of witness - restoration of humanity, connects people, patience (can't grow carrot in a day).

How can the soil be a gateway to a different kind of life?

Keith Skeine: Tribalism and Diversity

Plants are tribal - all connected by mycorrhizae of fungi under soil. Humans most tribal of animals. But it is tribalism that is important: it can exclude the exchange of information when it thinks it knows best. Dangerous as it then excludes diversity and brings loss of personal accountability. Multiculturalism - are the tribes tribal? If the tribes don't intermix then there is no diversity. How tribal are components in a multicultural society?...... Doze  sooo tired..........!

Bruce Stanley: Nature as Spiritual Director

How to read the second book of God - understanding God in Nature - God's revelation in the natural world. You can understand so much of God by reading nature:

AWE: Isn't it/God amazing. Just BE in the moment

STUDY: mindfulness, find your passion

MEDITATION: what does it mean?

Coaching or facilitation of communication with God and developing authenticity (?). Nature calls for us to give it attention when we are in it. Causes you to worship, pray and engage. Pilgrimage, ritual etc. Jesus' formation in the wilderness. In Nature - going in intentionally as part of a process - not just a visit. Best when we are alone. We are made to engage with it, to have a dialogue with it. Awakens senses, not just sight - find a deep authenticity of yourself. Patience, humility, health and well-being, less pain and stress; thinking, focus, improved concentration, calms mind. Jesus was experiential in what he did. What changes when we are in nature - time emotions etc. Go into nature and ask specific questions. Soul places, thin places.

Stonechat Land

Sketchy notes made whilst on the Gower in South Wales

Along the darkening cliffs towards the Worm's Head at Rohossili. Blue-grey sea to the left with clear, almost cloudless sky above; and to the right the windswept purple heather and gorse of the cliffs and cloud covered distant downs. The developing edge of grey clouds clouds above reflect edge of the cliffs below. And along this edge in front of me the bright orange sun reveals itself on the horizon. Its dazzling light a brilliant intrusion upon the grey landscape.

In the shelter of a rock high above the rocks and waves I watch the sun slowly slip behind a band of horizon cloud. The white quarter moon hangs out to sea: a celestial companion to the sun whose developing redness paints the cloud base. I am reminded of the ending to the original Wicker Man film. Now it has gone and I feel more alone now - just an occasional gull floats by and the grasses waving in the wind. Alone, to walk back through the bracken and restless stonechats.

I feel as if I have been here before. Possibly, many years ago and my memory can't recall details.

In an Edgeland

Sketchy notes made whilst on the Gower in South Wales

I'm in an edgeland
I'm in my edgeland
where the cliffs give way
and the purple heather and yellow gorse
reveal the black rock
and churning foam

I'm in an edgeland
I'm in my edgeland
where life meets death
where light meets dark
where the land reveals
its ancient rocks
and the restless sea
guided by the moon

I'm in an edgeland
I'm in my edgeland
where all behind me is left
and I can go no longer
and further forward.
This place tests my awareness
of life and possible death
and as the light fades
beneath the grey sky
the brighter horizon take with it
the memories of the day

I'm in an edgeland
I'm in my edgeland
where the cliffs are ragged
and the tumbling rocks
reveal unsteady ground.
I'm on my own
I must take care
before the night comes again

I'm in an edgeland
I'm in my edgeland
where I want my pain
to be like wave pounded rocks:
edges removed, roughness eroded
and soul massaged by the waves.
In isolation I sit
upon the close knit earth and herbs
I want to sing my song
to the music of the waves

I'm in an edgeland
I'm in my edgeland
sheltered by the cliffs
yet open to wildest elements
I'm open to their being.
The deep rocks reveal their history
the water of life is unwelcoming
and yet here I sit
listening to the landscape
and asking for its healing.
This place reveals creation
the edge is a place to be.
The edge is Divine Glory
The edge is the creation story.

Thank you

Edgeland

Sketchy notes made whilst on the Gower in South Wales

Waves, crashing against the time-worn rocks; rolling pebbles and an on-shore breeze. White spray over ice-green water beneath a solid grey sky. Here rocks form the grassy cliffs meet the infinite horizon of distant hope. Tumbling down; weather-worn over the years to meet the white foam. the sound is rhythmic and relentless. Beyond this point I cannot go, for here safety meets danger - a landscape that is foreign to me, and one that could easily bring death. I can go no further, these rocks are a symbol of my fate: erosion, pain brokenness, darkness; cold and wet. I am on the edge and a light drizzle now begins to fall - almost imperceptible. Colour grips to the eroded rocks in the form of many flowers: yellows, lilacs, purples, pinks and white.

The eroded cliff gullies reveal deep layers of conglomerate rock beneath the soil level, perhaps 20ft down. Embedded in the rounded stones are abundant white 'snail' shells. This place is a symbol of age, landscape changes and the passing of timescales beyond our comprehension.